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Gus // General ManagerBrian says “General Manager” Nikke says “Garbage Man” but we’re open to suggestions Nickname: Nothing to his face How did you get this job: ”A case of mistaken identity, Gus is really my brother!” How long employed: Nine Years How many times fired: “Zero – I know where the bodies are buried.” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “Don’t talk the business.” Best Night Ever: “$1500 tips pocketed off the front door one night and didn’t have to split it with anyone.” Worst Night Ever: “Occurred while I wasn’t even on duty.” Drinks while they’re working: “Who told?!” |
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Lyneal // Assistant Manager
Nickname: Trey, T.O., Captain (Think E40) How did you get this job: “I walked past Augie’s asking everyday if could get a job.” How long Employed: “Five, going on six years.” How many times fired: “None but I once quit because my girl got fired.” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “You’re not one of the cool kids until you’ve been fired or cussed out.” Best Night Ever: “Brian said we’re going to Thailand Wednesday… It was Sunday night.” Worst Night Ever: “The first Friday shift I shared with Vera.” Drinks while they’re working: “I haven’t drank anything since that hangover in Thailand.” |
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Big Fred // Security!!
Nickname: Huggy Bear How did you get this job: “On loan from a neighboring bar.” How long Employed: Four Years How many times fired: Twice Favorite Augie’s related quote: “Come give me a hug.” Best Night ever: “When my hug line went 15 deep.” Worst Night Ever: “When Brian told me no fraternizing with the entertainers and hugging the customers.” Drinks while they’re working: “No time for that, everyone needs a hug.” |
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Dre // Security!!Nickname: Andre Champagne How did you get this job: “I was hired over the phone while Brian was in Bangkok.” How long employed: Eight Years How many times fired: “Once.” Favorite Augie’s quote: “Ya’ll be easy” Best night ever: “The night my only threesome stole my bottle and left me!!!” Worst night: “Just after they left.” |
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Dante’ DJ Enferno // DJ (DICK oh I mean DISC JOCKEY)
Nickname: Enferno, Ferno, HOT FIRE, Mr. Flame. and whatever your mom calls me!!!! How did you get this job: “LMAO through Brians Neighbor… and bribery!!” How long employed: “Two years… I think.” How many times fired: “None yet but I can’t DJ at any other Cabarets.” Favorite Augie’s quote: “It ain’t an Augies party unless its topless” followed by “You in the mix wit DJ Ferno N..A!!!!!!!!!!!” Best night ever: “When I don’t cough from mace, I get extra tips, Nikki (the bartender is being nice), Oh and when ever Brians catches people with the water down the pants Joke.” Worst night: “When ever all or some of the dancers turn into cluck heads, BAGS, Scallywags, ETC… and don’t pay me all my money!!!” Drinks while they’re working: “LMAO DRINKS WHAT!!!!??” |
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Diamond // Entertainer
Nickname: Ms. 411 How did you get this job: “I walked in and said ‘What up bitches?!’!” How long employed: Two Years How many times fired: “Can’t fire me, I’m an independent contractor.” Favorite Augie’s quote: “I’m Diamond Bytch!” Best night ever: “Fridays!” Worst night: “That woman hit me with a crutch!” |
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Lovely // Entertainer
Nickname: Psycho How did you get this job: “I walked in buck naked.” How long employed: Two Years How many times fired: “Haha! I can’t get fired!!” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “It ain’t a mutha fucken party ’till the wigs come off!” Best Night Ever: “Every night I work.” Worst Night Ever: “Bianca pulling my panties down when she was drunk.” Drinks while they’re working: Patrón |
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Carmen // EntertainerNickname: High Yellow How did you get this job: “Batted my eyes and smiled.” How long employed: One Year How many times fired: Zero Favorite Augie’s related quote: “You’re such a peach!” Best Night Ever: “My 21st birthday party.” Worst Night Ever: “Whenever I’m not there.” Drinks while they’re working: “Vodka and cran, baby!” |
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Simone // EntertainerNickname: Miss Pretty How did you get this job: “Out shined all the amateurs.” How long employed: One Year How many times fired: “I don’t know what it means to be fired! So, I guess never.” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “This is not just an ass bar.” Best Night Ever: “When I’m wearing my pink outfit! I get lots of $$$$.” Worst Night Ever: “Sweated my hair out when I just got it done.” Drinks while they’re working: Moscato |
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Chu // Entertainer
Nickname: Ju Ju How did you get this job: ”Have you seen this body?! Enough said.” How long employed: Two Years How many times fired: Zero Favorite Augie’s related quote: “Where’s the money at?” Best Night Ever: “New Years Eve.” Worst Night Ever: “When I’m angry it’s everyone’s worst night.” Drinks while they’re working: Jägerbomb |
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Rose // Entertainer
Nickname: Baby – “‘Cause I’m the baby.” How did you get this job: “Flashed the owner.” How long employed: Six Months How many times fired: “I take my own leaves of absense.” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “To speak to the lord you must first go through Jesus Christ.” Best Night Ever: “Holliday Party.” Worst Night Ever: “White outfit, spilled drink, not good.” Drinks while they’re working: “None, I’m sober.” |
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Bianca // EntertainerNickname: Bubbles (as in champagne) How did you get this job: “I think it was the red dress!” How long employed: Four Years How many times fired: “I was not allowed to work the better side of five times.” Favorite Augie’s quote: “Twenty dollars please.” Best night ever: “The night the millionaire fell in love with me.” Worst night: “Caught on camera eating Tamia’s food.” |
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Isis // EntertainerNickname: Ice Queen How did you get this job: “Auditioned.” How long employed: Six Months How many times fired: Zero Favorite Augie’s related quote: “Your moms smells like fish sticks.” Best Night Ever: “Amateur Night” Worst Night Ever: “Falling on stage.” Drinks while they’re working: Margaritas |
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Dior // EntertainerNickname: New Booty How did you get this job: “Auditioned.” How long employed: “About a year, on and off.” How many times fired: Twice Favorite Augie’s related quote: “I’m the star of the show.” Best Night Ever: “When I made $1000.” Worst Night Ever: “When I made $200.” Drinks while they’re working: Patrón |
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Sexxy // EntertainerNickname: Ke Ke How did you get this job: “Tried out for an Amateur Night on a Friday.” How long employed: Four Years How many times fired: “Five. I think. Maybe More.” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “Fuck you mean?” Best Night Ever: “Made $1000 in one stage set.” Worst Night Ever: “Making no money.” Drinks while they’re working: “Hennessy on the rocks ’til the casket drops” |
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Dallas // Entertainer
Nickname: Goddess How did you get this job: “Auditioned.” How long employed: Five Years How many times fired: “Never, bitch.” Favorite Augie’s related quote: “Man, pay me! I don’t conversate for free!” Best Night Ever: “When I wasn’t drunk and I’m not getting yelled at by Gus.” Worst Night Ever: “Beat up butterfly.” Drinks while they’re working: Jack and Coke, Guinness on the side |
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Kemistry // Entertainer
Nickname: Kimmy How did you get this job: “Somebody needed to bring the SOUTH.” How long employed: Four Years How many times fired: “Four times. The last one was for throwing a chair on stage and breaking the mirror.” Favorite Augie’s quote: “Next on stage, Nisha Kimmy.” Best night ever: “$1500 wasn’t bad.” Worst night: “I was upside down on the pole and my hair fell off.” |
